Almost every marriage starts out as a huge celebration. Together
with their family and friends, each couple is full of hopes and dreams for
their future life together. But the road to a happy marriage is far from easy.
And as today’s divorce statistics demonstrate all too well, many couples opt
not to complete the journey.
It would be easy
to blame our high rate of marital failure on things like not spending enough
quality time together, allowing bitterness and resentment to build in our
hearts and failing to keep communication lines open. There’s no end to books,
articles and seminars that tell you how to improve these and many other aspects
of your relationship. But while quality time, forgiveness and communication are
vitally important to creating a happy marriage, if such things aren’t
happening, it’s usually a sign of a much deeper problem. And until this problem
is addressed, no amount of external behavior modification will work.
I believe that
virtually every marital problem can be traced back to one or both partners
failing to abide by these two laws. The same is true of any relationship. The
minute we begin to focus on our own wants and needs over those of God or our
partner; we’re destined for trouble.
Experiencing
communication problems in your marriage? How often do you really focus on
listening to what your partner (or God) has to say instead of insisting on more
airtime? Feeling bitterness and resentment growing toward your partner? When
was the last time you brought him or her before the Lord in prayer and truly
thanked God for your relationship? Struggling to find quality time together?
How about praying with your partner and asking God how he would like you to use
your time?
As you begin to
do these things, you’ll notice that your focus automatically starts to shift
away from you and your desires and over to God and your partner. As a result,
communication problems begin to improve, anger and resentment fade away and you
naturally want to spend more time together. Of course, you can’t expect such
changes to happen overnight. Your relationship is also bound to face financial
pressures, childrearing issues and other problems that are beyond your control.
But if you commit your relationship to God and make a conscious decision each
day to put God and your partner first, your marriage will be able to weather
any storm. Not only that; you’ll also have plenty of fun together along the
way!
Have you
struggled to find happiness in your marriage? Perhaps it’s time you and your
spouse invited God to direct your relationship..
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